Ashmash
Dentists And Lollies
posted Wednesday, 17 October 2007
My dentist never gives me a lolly anymore. I don’t think she’s completely forgiven me for biting off three of her fingers. I reckon she got off lightly. I don’t let just anyone stick their fist in my gob, you know (well, not on a first date).
There’s a shortage of NHS dentists, so I’m setting up my own emergency mobile practice. For fifteen quid I’ll pop round on my motorcycle, wrench out all your teeth and stick putty in the holes. It will hurt, and it won’t be pretty, but you’ll get a lolly. Vain customers after a bit of cosmetic whitening will get to gargle a litre of Dulux Gloss for three minutes, plus a lolly. That’ll be thirty quid (or twenty-five if you can spit the paint back into the tin). For fifty quid I’ll supply you with three hundred lollies and wait for your teeth to fall out by themselves, then I'll fill the holes with putty, and give you a lolly.
If I can negotiate a good deal on the lollies I could make a fortune.
There’s a shortage of NHS dentists, so I’m setting up my own emergency mobile practice. For fifteen quid I’ll pop round on my motorcycle, wrench out all your teeth and stick putty in the holes. It will hurt, and it won’t be pretty, but you’ll get a lolly. Vain customers after a bit of cosmetic whitening will get to gargle a litre of Dulux Gloss for three minutes, plus a lolly. That’ll be thirty quid (or twenty-five if you can spit the paint back into the tin). For fifty quid I’ll supply you with three hundred lollies and wait for your teeth to fall out by themselves, then I'll fill the holes with putty, and give you a lolly.
If I can negotiate a good deal on the lollies I could make a fortune.
comments (2)
1. Andrew Goulding left...
Friday, 30 November 2007 4:25 am :: http://www.andrewgoulding.com/
Dr. Ashmash,
2. Dr. Yankem Doon left...
Saturday, 29 December 2007 6:58 pm
I was once a Gelder and Porking Man, but gave it all up to become a
traveling Dentist. Now I have a very thriving practice in New York. I'm
famous for my Extractions. I find that I have only women clients, I had to
shoot any men or others that required to be fixed. I have been so
successful that I am offering Frachises. Our unit for traveling is a 35ft.
trailer, all mod condoms included. THIS is the only way to Dentist, Tugging
and Pulling can't be beat.